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No More Narchole

Narcissism: One of the few conditions where the patient is left alone and everyone is treated.

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Divorce

A day like today, a year ago

“It feels amazing when you no longer need or want the person who walked away from you.”

I don’t know who said that, but it is true. This week is the 1-year anniversary of my being served divorce papers, the ultimate discard action. I say the ultimate because it makes it official, with the law, even when the marriage could have been dead long before.

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Going home

“No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again.” ~ Buddha

What a week! I have not had time to write, so busy I have been. The main reason… drum roll, please… I am finally home!!!

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What Would You Like to Change?

There’s a blog I follow in here, Make It Ultra. I found this entry there today: http://wp.me/p7bq2c-6Lp. I felt compelled to answer that question. What follows is my answer. And after reading it once again, I had realized that, despite everything that I’m still dealing with concerning the divorce and custody battles, I am in fact finding myself once again. Indeed, it is a great feeling, one I not long ago thought I would never feel.

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Maybe not today

I’m having a hard day today. My daughter has been feverish and not doing well for the last few days and I don’t feel I can make any decisions concerning her, at all.

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When the tables are turned

~ Love doesn’t hurt. Lying, cheating, and screwing with people’s feelings and emotions hurt.

How great it feels when you can finally show the narcissist in your life that their threats and insults just slide from you like nothing. I still have a long way to go. However, the argument we had the other night has proven that I have come a long way from where I was about 3 years ago.

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NPD Divorce: Avoid Psychological Evaluations

I’m only talking from my own experience. Always follow your attorney’s advise. With that said, I had read many blogs and fora about divorcing an individual with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and many survivors and victims out there are advising to avoid psychological evaluations at all cost. I wish I had that option. I did not. Ours was court-mandated. Mark my words: The narc will ace the evaluations.

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Do you believe me?

I asked my attorney. “Do NOT lose faith. You are stronger than that. I believe in you, your mom does and a lot of other people who provide you great support.” I go back to the e-mail message. I keep on reading her words in probably a desperate effort to find the strength to not give up. I can’t help but cry a little while reading them. And she’s right. I am stronger than this. I do have support from my closest friends and I don’t know where I would be without my mom. But I can’t help feeling this way when I feel I’m swimming against the current.

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In a very dark place

Before I get to it, I want to say that this entry may be found triggering for some readers. I just want to warn you. I’m already in a dark place. I don’t want to drag other people there with me. So please, stop reading if you must. I encourage you to do so.

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Today… No, tomorrow. No! Both days

So once again, I had to wait for my husband to come back with our daughter from his parents’ this past Saturday. And once again, he was late. And once again, he tried to gaslight me. It’s getting old.

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